~ Strangers ~

Strangers .........



We are both strangers at the start….
Learn to accept as friends….
As days pass by we became entwined….


We laugh together and shared the good times….
We shed tears when were down….
We build a foundation and dreams as high as the sky….
We cherish that times we spend together….
We thought it will last forever, till the end of time….


Then......


You became silent and never speak up….
You judged me and set me aside….
You abandoned me ...
What shall I do...


we were strangers….

~ The Withered Rose ~

The Withered Rose .........




If beauty is like a rose,
then it will also have a thorn.
Before you know it,
you’ll get pricked,
then you’ll feel the sting of that beauty.
Was it worth it then?


If beauty is like a rose,
then you’ll have to nurture it properly.
Lest it shall die and in it’s place
you’ll find nothing
but an ugly weed.


If beauty is like a rose,
then in time it will wither.
The petals will fall and in it’s place
nothing will be,
even when nurtured,
the petals will fall
and be scattered in the wind.

~ Am I Happy ~

Am I Happy? ......


About happiness in life.

I always consider that life is one. We all are living one single life. And that’s the reason we should all try to be happy in our life. But to ascertain whether we’re happy or not is a difficult task. In this regard I want to share my philosophy with you.

It is just three simple question and answers. If the answers of all the questions are YES, you are sure to be happy.

The questions are:

(1) Can you sleep when you want to? If the answer is YES, you are happy.
Think of a person suffering from serious insomnia; a night is nightmare to him.

(2) Do you have the taste of food, because God takes away the taste when you're unhappy . And a person is most unhappy when he or she loses the taste of food. If the answer to the second question also comes YES, you are again happy.

(3) Do you have at least one friend with whom you can share the most of your sorrows. This friend may be your children, parents or any loved one. If the answer is YES again, you are surely happy.

In all the three questions stated above if the answers are YES, you are pretty happy.

A happy man is contributory to his family, friends and community, and also to any organization. It’s the unhappiness that’s the greatest barrier to any prosperity.


(by : Sagar Chowdhury )

~ 10 Interesting Facts About Strawberries ~

10 Interesting Facts About Strawberries .........



Strawberry, berry quite familiar. During the season we can use it as a dessert every day, without even thinking about useful, almost medicinal properties of this unique fruit.
So, briefly on the main!

1. It is proved by science, the daily use strengthens the immune system!

2. Strawberries are an excellent antiseptic and anti-inflammatory agent. Strawberry suppresses the development of influenza virus.

3. The presence of the Iodine strawberries offset it in their daily food and drinking water.

4. Strawberry has sugar lowering effect. Therefore, it included in the diet, diabetes.

5. If you have problems with the urinary system kidney and urinary tract is recommended to use the entire season strawberries. It is better to eat every day not less than 400 grams.

6. Strawberries – natural diuretic!

7. Salicylic acid, contained in this unique berry, helps reduce pain in the joints!

8. Strawberries can make iron deficiency anemia. In 200 g fresh strawberries to deter: 60 calories, 4.6 grams fiber, 0 grams fat, 1.2 grams protein, 14 g carbohydrates, 28 mg calcium, 0.8 mg iron, 20 mg magnesium 38 mg phosphorus, 54 mg potassium, 1.4 mg selenium 113.4 mg of vitamin C, 35.4 mcg of folic acid, 54 IU of vitamin A.

9. Masks of strawberries well dried and cure acne, tightens pores.

10. Fragrant juice of fresh strawberries – the best lotion! This is a miracle cure to remove age spots and freckles.

Strawberries are obviously rich in healing properties, but they are also easy to lose as it was given. Therefore, the storage of strawberries relevant than ever!

First, it is important to remember that strawberries can not be long kept in the refrigerator. The fact that the strawberries, which could easily be grown with nitrates become water, a carcinogenic mush. In principle it is better not to keep strawberries at all. Experts advise to eat it within two days after harvest. If you still need to keep the berries in the refrigerator there, you should not wash strawberries before storing.

Strawberry fruit is as useful as the tremulous, so be careful with her “peace of mind”!

~ The 14 guidance of human life....~

The 14 guidance of human life....



Life’s greatest enemy is our self

Life’s greatest failure is arrogant

Life’s greatest ignorance is dupe

Life’s greatest sorrow is jealousy

Life’s greatest erroneous is self-abandon

Life’s greatest admiration is choice of advancing

Life’s greatest gratification is alms

Life’s greatest wealth is healthiness

Life’s greatest gift is forgiveness

Life’s greatest pitiable disposition is self-abased

Life’s greatest sin is to deceive oneself

Life’s greatest liabilities is a debt of human sympathy

Life’s greatest imperfection is melancholy wisdom

Life’s greatest insolvent is despair



( http://authspot.com/thoughts/)

~ A Woman ~

A Woman ......



There had been so many stories about man loving a woman
There had even been written songs about their tales
Some are happy and some are sad
Some are finished and some are not.



But few were a story written the other way around
About a woman loving a man
Most of the songs we heard about them
Were sad and no happy endings.



Perhaps a glimpse of it should be revealed
When a woman loves a man
It’s a magical feeling in a fairy tale
That can make a man so proud.



She can endure, bear and go on with the pains
She can be strong yet loving for her man
She can do the rest what her lover can’t give
She can hold the world all by her hands.



She’s ready to face what life can bring
Ready to take a long road ahead
Willing to sacrifice everything
Just to be with the man of her dreams.



And one thing I’m sure what a woman wants
A little hug, a sweet kiss will make her glad
A little respect, a faithful love and a little break
Will make her more stronger and not weak.



And one more thing I can tell of a woman
She loves to serve all her love ones
She also needs to be understood and to be treated right
And I bet, you’ll get the best from all her might.

~ I Will Wait ~

I Will Wait .........



If you are gone, I will wait for you
Till the night has come and the day is through
For I’m afraid if you’re not with me
Every moment is precious in every little way.



As free as the birds, my love is true
As high as the skies and deep as the blues
I love to feel every beat of my heart,
Just like a love song from the start.



Like the river that runs to the sea
Like the mountains that plays with breeze
Like the innocent child that plays the harp
I will wait for you till the end, my love.



When summer’s gone and the winter is through
Till the early spring and fall will go
All through the years till my days are gone
I will wait for you, till the end of time.



I will wait for you whatever it takes
Even if it means a thousand years
For my life is nothing without you my love
I will wait for you with the heavens above.



Like the rain that pours and washed away my tears
I’ll endure the pains though I am in vain
Don’t forget my promise, till the end of time
I will wait for you,
till my life is gone....




( http://authspot.com/poetry)

~ Look into my eyes ~

Look into my eyes .........



Look into my eyes,
see the joy,
see the fire.
see love's lost.
see the newness,
see the end,
See a heart.
See it break.

What can you see when you look into my eyes?
See the passion,
see the laughter,
see our lives in a time when we still were.
see the love I still have

If you only would look into my eyes.....

~ The Paradox of Our Age ~

The Paradox of Our Age .........



we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers;
wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints;
we spend more, but have less;
we buy more, but enjoy it less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families;
more coveniences, but less time;
we have more degrees, but less sense;
more knowledge, but less judgment;
more experts, but more problems;
more medicine, but less wellness.

We spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom and lie too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life;
We've added years to life, not life to years.
We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.
We've conquered outer space, but not inner space;
We've done larger things, but not better things;
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul;
We've split the atom, but not our prejudice;
We write more, but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less.
We've learned to rush, but not to wait;
We have higher incomes; but lower morals;
More food but less appeasement;
More acquaintances, but fewer friends;
More effort but less success.

We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication;
We've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion;
Tall men, and short character;
Steep profits, and shallow relationships.

These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare;
More leisure and less fun;
More kinds of food, but less nutrition.
These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality,
one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.

It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom.

Think about it. Read it again. Value and embrace your family, your faith, your friends, and your life dearly.

~ Alhamdulillah ~

Alhamdulillah .........
By Shariffa Carlo


What is the meaning of alhamdulillah? It is usually translated as, 'All praise is due to Allah.' Which has led many of us to use the phrase, Alhamdulillah wa shukr Allah.' But this is very incorrect because alhamdulillah is actually is a word of praise that includes within it a greater gratitude or shukr for what Allah has ordained, and as Muslims, we are supposed to use it when we are presented with that which appears good and with that which appears bad.

But, in the reality of our lives, what is alhamdulillah? What does it truly mean? Is just a word on our lips? Or is it a genuine feeling in our hearts? Someone once told me that alhamdulillah means when you don't have something you need or want, you are content with your fate; when you have a limited quantity of that thing, you are content with it, and you try to share it, and when you have a lot, you are content, and you are searching for ways to share it more. In other words, no matter what your condition, you are grateful to Allah for that condition. It is a recognition that all that Allah has given us or taken from us is the best for us.

In practical terms, what does this mean. There is an example that I like to use when I speak of Allah's Knowledge and Power over us that may help illustrate my meaning. When I was a new Muslimah, I had the most beautiful white cat. I loved this cat very much. It used to wake me up for fajr, and I considered it a great blessing in my life. The problem, however, was that my landlady did not allow pets in my apartment. This meant that the cat's presence had to remain a secret. One day, the landlady called and told me that she was coming that day to do the periodic spraying for roaches. I knew I had to hide the cat, but in such a way that he did not come home again from where I put him, so I decided to take him to a friend's house for the day. So, I grabbed my cat, and took him to my car. As I was driving to her house, the cat went crazy. He was clawing at me and at one point attached himself to the back of my head. I guess he had never been in a car before, and was terrified. He thought this was the worst thing that could have possibly happened to him. Now, I had information that the cat did not. I knew that my actions were actually a salvation for him. If my landlady had found the cat, we would have both been homeless. But, of course, there was no way for the cat to know this. It was beyond his comprehension.

What is the point here? Well, Allah places us in many situations that are similar. He provides us with circumstances that in our limited understanding and perception we find to be disastrous. We can react to them as the cat did, with fear and pure animal instincts, or we can recognize Allah's Wisdom and Superior Knowledge, and be content with the situation because we have faith that it is somehow better for us to experience this. To be content with it, would be to live out alhamdulillah. It would show our acceptance of Allah's Power over us, our recognition of His care for us, and our gratitude for His Mercy.

For Allah says,

"...This is of the grace of my Lord that He may try me whether I am grateful or ungrateful; and whoever is grateful, he is grateful only for his own soul, and whoever is ungrateful, then surely my Lord is Self-sufficient, Honored. (27:40)

Allah had given us so much, and our duty as Muslims is to be grateful for those many blessings. Ibin Abid -Dunya mentioned that Dawud asked Allah, "What is the least of your blessings?" Allah revealed to him to take a breath. Dawud did so, and Allah told him, This is the least of my blessings on you." (I found this hadith in Patience and Gratitude by Ibin Qayim Al Jawziyyah, p. 70).

Imagine that, taking a breath as a blessing from Allah. It is an involuntary action that basically sustains us. So much is involved, not only from the physiological perspective but also from the conditions that must exist on the earth to create the perfect combination of elements for us to breathe. One breath of a human involves the workings of all of his internal organs as well as the fact that we have plants that take our carbon dioxide and convert them back to oxygen which is essential for us to continue breathing. The processes involved are so many and so detailed that they can not be covered except by an entire science course which will just outline the basics. Allahu Akbar.

We must remember that all that we possess is from Allah. But we can not stop there. We must also recognize that that which we do not possess is also a blessing from Allah. We must recognize the Power and Knowledge of Allah by being grateful for His Blessings. Things are not always as they seem. We may condiser something to be bad, horrible or disastrous, when in actuality it is purely Allah's blessing on us. Remember the story of Musa and Al Khadir:

'Moses got up to deliver a sermon before Bani Israel and he was asked, 'Who is the most learned person among the people?' Moses replied, 'I (am the most learned).' Allah then admonished Moses for he did not ascribe all knowledge to Allah only (Then) came the Divine Inspiration:-- 'Yes, one of Our slaves at the junction of the two seas is more learned than you.'

Moses said, 'O my Lord ! How can meet him?' Allah said, 'Take a fish in a basket and wherever the fish is lost, follow it (you will find him at that place). So Moses set out along with his attendant Yusha' bin Nun, and they carried with them a fish till they reached a rock and rested there. Moses put his head down and slept. (Sufyan, a sub-narrator said that somebody other than 'Amr said) 'At the rock there was a water spring called 'Al-Hayat' and none came in touch with its water but became alive. So some of the water of that spring fell over that fish, so it moved and slipped out of the basket and entered the sea. From Sahih Bukhari: Volume 6, Book 60, Number 251: Narrated by Said bin Jubair:

When they had passed on (some distance), Moses said to his attendant: "Bring us our early meal; truly we have suffered much fatigue at this (stage of) our journey." He replied: "Sawest thou (what happened) when we betook ourselves to the rock? I did indeed forget (about) the Fish: none but Satan made me forget to tell (you) about it: it took its course through the sea in a marvellous way!" Moses said: "That was what we were seeking after:" So they went back on their footsteps, following (the path they had come). So they found one of Our servants, on whom We had bestowed Mercy from Ourselves and whom We had taught knowledge from Our own Presence. Moses said to him: "May I follow thee, on the footing that thou teach me something of the (Higher) Truth which thou hast been taught?" (The other) said: "Verily thou wilt not be able to have patience with me!" "And how canst thou have patience about things about which thy understanding is not complete?" He said: If Allah pleases, you will find me patient and I shall not disobey you in any matter He said: If you would follow me, then do not question me about any thing until I myself speak to you about it So they went (their way) until when they embarked in the boat he made a hole in it. (Musa) said: Have you made a hole in it to drown its inmates? Certainly you have done a grievous thing. He said: Did I not say that you will not be able to have patience with me? He said: Blame me not for what I forgot, and do not constrain me to a difficult thing in my affair. So they went on until, when they met a boy, he slew him. (Musa) said: Have you slain an innocent person otherwise than for manslaughter? Certainly you have done an evil thing. He said: Did I not say to you that you will not be able to have patience with me? He said: If I ask you about anything after this, keep me not in your company; indeed you shall have (then) found an excuse in my case. So they went on until when they came to the people of a town, they asked them for food, but they refused to entertain them as guests. Then they found in it a wall which was on the point of falling, so he put it into a right state. (Musa) said: If you had pleased, you might certainly have taken a recompense for it. He said: This shall be separation between me and you; now I will inform you of the significance of that with which you could not have patience. As for the boat, it belonged to (some) poor men who worked on the river and I wished that I should damage it, and there was behind them a king who seized every boat by force. And as for the boy, his parents were believers and we feared lest he should make disobedience and ingratitude to come upon them: So we desired that their Lord might give them in his place one better than him in purity and nearer to having compassion. And as for the wall, it belonged to two orphan boys in the city, and there was beneath it a treasure belonging to them, and their father was a righteous man; so your Lord desired that they should attain their maturity and take out their treasure, a mercy from your Lord, and I did not do it of my own accord. This is the significance of that with which you could not have patience. (18:60-82).

Musa was not patient in learning the meanings of what he had seen. But he learned a very important leasson, one we should take to heart. Allah's Knowledge is so beyond ours, even when he gives one of us a bit more that the other, we can not see easily beyond the superficial meanings of the events of life, and we must trust Allah's judgement and be grateful for the favors He confers on us. We must say and feel alhamdulillah. We must make it a true part of our lives. The foundation of our faith.

Such a simple word, but it carries so much in it. It tells of our faith in Allah. It shows how we must accept the qadr of Allah in times we consider good and times we consider bad, not turning our backs on Allah, like the people of the boat, when Allah gives us what we want, but being grateful for whatever occurs good or bad.

Allah says,

He it is Who makes you travel by land and sea; until when you are in the ships, and they sail on with them in a pleasant breeze, and they rejoice, a violent wind overtakes them and the billows surge in on them from all sides, and they become certain that they are encompassed about, they pray to Allah, being sincere to Him in obedience: If Thou dost deliver us from this, we will most certainly be of the grateful ones. But when He delivers them, lo! they are unjustly rebellious in the earth. O men! your rebellion is against your own souls-- provision (only) of this world's life-- then to Us shall be your return, so We will inform you of what you did. (10:22-23) We can not only say alhamdulillah, and be grateful slaves when we are blessed with what we want, we must also remain grateful when we are hit by the worst of disasters. In my humble opinion, the worst loss this nation ever had, was the death of our beloved prophet, Muhammad. We recognize his humanity, but it was when he departed us that the splits began in the ummah. The blessing of unity, one he was not granted by his Lord, is a terrible black mark on the ummah. Yet, we must have faith that in some way, this is beneficial to us. In some way there is a blessing, and for it we must say, alhamdulillah.

Allah says,

And Muhammad is no more than a messenger; the messengers have already passed away before him; if then he dies or is killed will you turn back upon your heels? And whoever turns back upon his heels, he will by no means do harm to Allah in the least and Allah will reward the grateful. (3:144)

Our beloved prophet dies, and we are to be grateful? To the human mind and heart this is incomprehensible, but this is where our faith comes in. If we truly trust in Allah's Judgement, we must be grateful. Alhamdulillah rabil Al Amiin for all that He brings to us. We must accept the bitter with the sweet because we believe in Allah, we trust in Him and we know that He is the Best of Judges, the Most Wise, and His plan for us is the Fairest, Most Merciful and Best for us in this life and in the hereafter.

Allah says,

Therefore remember Me, I will remember you, and be thankful to Me, and do not be ungrateful to Me. (2:152)

And

And hold fast, all together, by the rope which Allah (stretches out for you), and be not divided among yourselves; and remember with gratitude Allah's favour on you; for ye were enemies and He joined your hearts in love, so that by His Grace, ye became brethren; and ye were on the brink of the pit of Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus doth Allah make His Signs clear to you: That ye may be guided. (3:103)

And

O ye who believe! Eat of the good things that We have provided for you, and be grateful to Allah, if it is Him ye worship. (2:172)

Also, let us remember to be extra grateful, for , " When anything came to the Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) which caused pleasure (or, by which he was made glad), he prostrated himself in gratitude to Allah." Narrated by AbuBakrah. Sunan Abu Dawud: Book 14, Number 2768. What ever is for us is for us. We can not avoid our Qadr. Our control comes in how we handle it when it comes. Ali Ibin Abi Talib saw adiyy Ibin Hatim looking sorrowful, and so he asked him, "Why are you so sad, O Adiyy?" Adiyy replied, "How can I not be in such a state when both of my sons have been killed and my eye gouged out?" So Ali said to him, "O Adiyy, whoever is content with the decree of Allah will surely experience it and be rewarded for it; and whoever is not content with the decree of Allah will surely experience it, and Allah will make his actions worthless." (Purification of the Soul, p119).

We will experience what Allah has ordained for us. But will it bring us blessings or only misery. We must accept the decree of Allah, be content with it and be grateful for it, because we know what Allah has decreed is the best for us. This is the implementation of alhamdulillah.

Now, the blessings of alhamdulillah in itself are many. Below I will show a few of these many blessings:

Narrated Ali: Fatima went to the Prophet complaining about the bad effect of the stone hand-mill on her hand. She heard that the Prophet had received a few slave girls. But (when she came there) she did not find him, so she mentioned her problem to 'Aisha. When the Prophet came, 'Aisha informed him about that. 'Ali added, "So the Prophet came to us when we had gone to bed. We wanted to get up (on his arrival) but he said, 'Stay where you are." Then he came and sat between me and her and I felt the coldness of his feet on my abdomen. He said, "Shall I direct you to something better than what you have requested? When you go to bed say 'Subhan Allah' thirty-three times, 'Alhamdulillah' thirty three times, and Allahu Akbar' thirty four times, for that is better for you than a servant." Sahih Bukhari: Volume 7, Book 64, Number 274.

Narrated AbuMalik al-Ash'ari: The Messenger of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) said: Cleanliness is half of faith and Alhamdulillah (Praise be to Allah) fills the scale, and SubhanAllah (Glory be to Allah) and Alhamdulillah (Praise be to Allah) fill up what is between the heavens and the earth, and prayer is a light, and charity is proof (of one's faith) and endurance is a brightness and the Qur'an is a proof on your behalf or against you. All men go out early in the morning and sell themselves, thereby setting themselves free or destroying themselves. Sahih Muslim: Book 2, Number 0432.

Narrated AbuDharr: Some of the people from among the companions of the Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) said to him: Messenger of Allah, the rich have taken away (all the) reward. They observe prayer as we do, they keep the fasts as we keep them, and they give sadaqah from their surplus riches. Upon this he (the Holy Prophet) said: Has Allah not prescribed for you (a course) by following which you can (also) do sadaqah? In every declaration of the glorification of Allah (i.e. saying SubhanAllah) there is a sadaqah, every Takbir (i.e. saying AllahuAkbar) is a sadaqah, every praise of Him (saying Alhamdulillah) is a sadaqah, every declaration that He is One (La ilaha illallah) is sadaqah, enjoining of good is a sadaqah, forbidding of that which is evil is a Sadaqah, and in man's sexual intercourse (with his wife) there is a Sadaqah. They (the companions) said: Messenger of Allah, is there reward for him who satisfies his sexual passion among us? He said: Tell me, if he were to devote it to something forbidden, would it not be a sin on his part? Similarly, if he were to devote it to something lawful, he should have a reward. Sahih Muslim: Book 5, Number 2198.

Narrated Samurah ibn Jundab: The dearest words to Allah are four: SubhanAllah (Hallowed be Allah), Alhamdulillah (Praise be to Allah), La ilaha illallah (There is no god but Allah), and AllahuAkbar (God is the Greatest)... Sahih Muslim: Book 24, Number 5329.

Narrated Anas ibn Malik: Allah's Apostle (peace_be_upon_him) said: Allah is pleased with His servant who says: Alhamdulillah while taking a morsel of food and while drinking. Sahih Muslim: Book 34, Number 6592.

Narrated Abu Huraira: Some poor people came to the Prophet and said, "The wealthy people will get higher grades and will have permanent enjoyment and they pray like us and fast as we do. They have more money by which they perform the Hajj, and 'Umra; fight and struggle in Allah's Cause and give in charity." The Prophet said, "Shall I not tell you a thing upon which if you acted you would catch up with those who have surpassed you? Nobody would overtake you and you would be better than the people amongst whom you live except those who would do the same. Say "Sub-han-al-lah", "Alhamdu-lillah" and "Allahu Akbar" thirty three times each after every (compulsory) prayer." We differed and some of us said that we should say, "Subhan-al-lah" thirty three times and "Alhamdu lillah" thirty three times and "Allahu Akbar" thirty four times. I went to the Prophet who said, "Say, "Subhan-al-lah" and "Alhamdu lillah" and "Allahu Akbar" all together for thirty three times." Sahih Bukhari: Volume 1, Book 12, Number 804.

I pray that Allah give us the faith, poatience and gratitude to impliment alhamdulillah into ours lives as true pious slaves of Allah. May He forgive us guide us and provide us with the best in this life and the next. Ameen


(http://www.themodernreligion.com/index2.html)

~ Joy Forever, Grief Forever ~

Joy Forever, Grief Forever ........

(By Khalid Baig )
(http://www.albalagh.net)

All through the centuries Allah sent down thousands of messengers, dozens of books, and one Message. This central Message has three components. 1) Allah is the Creator and the Master of the universe. He is the One we must worship and obey. 2) He sent down guidance through messengers and books. 3) Just as death is certain in this world, so is resurrection in the Hereafter. Then everyone will face everlasting consequences of their response to Allah's commands: joy forever or grief forever.

It is this last part that can bring immediate clarity and concentration to our minds and change the call of the messengers from "interesting" to immensely serious and urgent. The messengers do not do philosophy or present theories. They have News for us and it is extremely urgent. That is why the Qur'an refers to the messengers as nadhir (warners) and describes this as their primary mission: "We have sent emissaries only as heralds and warners while those who disbelieve idly argue away so they may refute the Truth by means of it. They treat My signs and what they are warned of as a joke!" [Al-Kahf 18:56]

An unimaginably huge catastrophe is about to befall the humanity. Let it be warned, so it can ward it off. You must drop everything and listen to the messenger with all seriousness. Now.

This is a life-altering message. Anyone who understands and accepts it can no longer remain the same old person who did not understand or accept it. It says that this world is not what it appears to be. This is not our destination; what happens to us here is not our ultimate destiny. Any life lived here on the assumption that this life is all there is to it will be entirely wasted.

We know there are problems in this world. The strong can get away with murder. The weak are oppressed. We yearn for justice and don't find it. The joys of this life are also both short-lived and mixed with sorrows. We yearn for pure bliss and don't find it. This message tells us that our desires for justice and unmixed happiness are not in vain. We will get them in the eternal Afterlife. What seems to be an imperfect world is actually a perfect testing ground. The joys and sufferings here are meant to test how we behave under different circumstances in life. Those who lead a life of righteousness and obedience to Allah will taste real joy in the Hereafter. Those who lead a life of disobedience, sin, and corruption will taste real punishment. This message gives us hope when there is no hope. It gives us the strength to be steadfast in the face of the forces of evil. It liberates us from the bondage to here and now. It changes our outlook and consequently our entire life.

It is impossible for our thoughts and actions to be right and righteous in the absence of belief in the Hereafter. How many people will resist temptations if there are no consequences to be feared for doing so? And for how long? How many will engage in good even though it costs and avoid evil even though it seems to pay? Human beings are driven by rewards and punishments. But the only perfect system of reward and punishment is offered by the Hereafter. Therefore it is impossible to fix this world by ignoring the Hereafter.

There is more. The Qur'an says: "Those who do not believe in the Hereafter, call the angels by the names of females." [An-Najm 53:27] What has the disbelief in the Hereafter to do with this act? They engage in this conjecture about the angels whom they have not seen and have no sure way of knowing about, because they are not serious. And they are not serious because of their disbelief in the Hereafter. Frivolity and vanity are a side effect of this disbelief. And when they take control of life, the entire life is destined to ruin.

While the disbelief in the Hereafter has no legs to stand on, this world does have the charm that can overcome that disadvantage! The result may be that we continue to profess belief in the Hereafter, yet live as if it does not matter. Or that we even change our beliefs too. It has happened before. Rabbi Dr. Louis Jacobs, rabbi of the New London Synagogue, writes: "Among many contemporary Jewish theologians there is a marked tendency to leave the whole question of eschatology without discussion, either because they do not believe in the Hereafter at all or because they believe that the finite mind of man is incapable of piercing the veil and it is best to leave the subject severely alone." And while Orthodox Jews still believe in resurrection, it is with a twist. They believe that when the Messiah (who they think will be a person from the family of King David) comes, the righteous dead will be brought back to life to enjoy life here again. The wicked will not be resurrected. So the Hereafter will be here and there will be no real punishment for the wicked.

We can now appreciate the emphasis Islam places on remembering death and resurrection. As a Muslim wakes up, he says: "Praise be to Allah Who gave us life after death and unto Him is the Resurrection." When he goes to bed his prayer is: "O Allah, in Your name do I die and live." When he begins eating he says: "O Allah, bless us in what You have provided for us and protect us from the Fire." When he rides he says: "Glory be to Him Who has subjected these to our (use), for we could have never accomplished this (by ourselves). And to our Lord shall we be sent back." [Az-Zukhruf, 43: 13-14]. So our sleep reminds us of our death and all through the waking hours we keep on refreshing that remembrance. In regular prayers and while reading the Qur'an it is impossible to continue for any length of time without being reminded that this life is temporary and our permanent abode is in the Hereafter. A beautiful dua (supplication) further highlights a Muslim's concerns: "O Allah, do not make this world our greatest worry, the sum total of our knowledge, and the object of our desires."

The person who always remembers the Hereafter is like the driver who constantly keeps his eyes on the destination. He is the only one likely to successfully get there.

~ The Things Which Shaytaan Flees From ~

The Things Which Shaytaan Flees From :

1. When you say: La ilaha illAllaah - wahdahu laa shareeka lahu - lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu - wa huwa 'ala kulli shay'in qadeer. [There is none worthy of worship except Allah alone. He has no partners. To Him belongs the Dominion, to Him belongs all praise and He is capable over all things] a hundred times a day.

The evidence is what has been reported in the Saheeh of al Bukhaari and Muslim from Abu Hurayrah (ra) that Allaah's Messenger (saw) mentioned the above words and then said: "He will receive the reward of setting free ten slaves, a hundred good deeds will be written for him and a hundred bad deeds will be erased from him. It will be a sanctuary from Shaytaan for him on that day until he reaches the evening. No one will come with something better except one who increases beyond that".


2. Recitation of Ayaat ul-Kursi when you go to bed.

Abu Hurayrah (ra) reported that the Messenger (saw) put him in charge of guarding the zakaah of Ramadan and someone would come and take handfuls from the zakaah for two nights in succession. On the third night, he (Abu Hurayrah) grabbed him and said: "I will take you to Allaah's Messenger (saw)". He (the thief) said: "Leave me alone and I will teach you some words by which Allaah will benefit you". He then said, "When you depart to go to your bed recite aayaat ul-Kursi until you complete it. There wil never cease to be from Allaah a guardian to protect you and Shaytaan will not approach you until you wake up". When he explained this to Allaahs Messenger (saw), he said, "He has told you the truth althought he is a great liar". (al-Bukhaari).


3. When you spit on your left three times and seek refuge in Allaah from the evil of what you see in a dream.

Abu Salamah bin 'Abdur-Rahman said: "I heard Abu Qataadah ibn Rab'iyy say: "I heard Allaah's Messenger (saw) say, "The good dream is from Allaah and the bad dream is from Shaytaan. When one of you sees what he dislikes, let him spit on his left three times when he awakens and let him seek refuge in Allaah from its evil and then it will not harm him"". Abu Salamah said, "I used to see in my dream that which wouldbe more burdensome to me than a mountain and when I heard this hadeeth I considered it as nothing." In another narration he said, "I used to see in my dream which would make me concerned until I heard Abu Qataadah say: "I used to have dreams which would make me ill until I heard Allaah's Messenger (saw) say, "The righteous dream is from Allaah. If one of you sees what he loves then let him not inform anyone about it except one whom he loves. And if he sees what he dislikes, let him not inform anyone about it. Let him spit on his left three times and let him seek refuge in Allaah from Shaytaan, the accursed from the evil of what he saw and it will not harm him.""


4. Upon saying, when leaving the house "Bismillah tawakaltu 'ala Allah, la hawla wa la quwata illaa bilLah" [In the Name of Allah, I place my trust upon Alaah, There is no power nor movement except by Allaah].

Anas (ra) reports that Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "Whoever says (when he leaves his house): "In the Name of Allah, I place my trust upon Alaah, There is no power nor movement except by Allaah" it is said to him: "You have been sufficed, you have been protected and you have been guided". Then one of the devils turns to another and says, "How can you get to a man who has been sufficed, protected and guided". (Abu Dawud, at-Tirmidhi, hasan saheeh).

Umm Salamah (ra) said, "Allaah's Messenger (saw) never left my house except that he raised his sight to the sky and said, "Allahumma innee a'oodhu bika an adil aw udal, aw azil aw uzal, aw azlima aw uslam, aw ajhal aw yujhal 'aleeyy (O Allaah I seek refuge in you from leading others astray and being led astray, from causing others to slip and being made to slip, from oppressing others or being oppressed and from making others ignorant, and being kept ignorant."" (at-Tirmidhi, Abu Dawood, an-Nasa'ee, Ibn Majah. at-Tirmidhi said "hasan saheeh", al-Albaani agreed with him in al-Kalim ut-Tayyib, no.59).


5. Remembering Allaah the Sublime and Exalted when entering the house and before eating.

Jaabir (ra) said: "I heard the Prophet (saw) say: "When a man enters his house and remembers Allaah the Exalted upon entering and before eating, Shaytaan says: "There is no place for you to spend the night and there is no supper for you." When he enters the house and does not remember Allaah, Shaytaan says: "You have found a place to spend the night" and when he does not remember Allaah upon eating his food, Shaytaan says: "You have found a place to stay and some supper"". (Muslim).


6. Saying "A'oodhu bilLahil-'adheem wa bi wajhil-kareemi wa bi sultaanihil-qadeemi min ash-Shaytaani-rajeem" [I seek refuge with Allaah the Mighty, with His Noble Face and with His Eternal Authority from Shaytaan, the Accursed] when entering the mosque.

'Abdullah ibn 'Umar (ra) said, "When the Prophet (saw) used to enter the mosque he woul say, "I seek refuge with Allaah the Mighty, with His Noble Face and with His Eternal Authority from Shaytaan, the Accursed". He then said, "When (a man) says this, Shaytaan says: "He has been protected from me for the whole day"". (Abu Dawud, al-Albaani declared it saheeh in Saheeh Abu Dawood, no. 458, and an-Nawawee and Ibn Hajr declared it hasan).


7. Upon pronouncing the adhaan.

This is due to what has been reported from Abu Hurayrah (ra) that Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "When the call to prayer is made, Shaytaan flees on his heels and passes wind with noise during his flight so that he does not hear the adhaan. When the adhaan is completed he comes back. When the iqaamah is pronounced he takes to his heels again until it is completed. Then he returns again and whispers into the heart of the person and says to him:

"Remember this and remember that". So the person remembers those things which were not in his mind before the prayer began and as a result, he forgets how much he has prayed". (al-Bukhaari, Muslim).

Pronouncing the adhaan can be done at any time to repel Shaytaan. This is due to what has been reported by Muslim from Abu Saheel bin Abu Saalih who said: "My father sent me to Bani Harithah and there was a young boy with me. Someone called him by his name from a wall, so he went to have a look at the wall but did not see anything. I mentioned that to my father and he said: "If I had known that you would encounter this I would not have sent you. However, when you hear a voice then make the call for prayer since I heard Abu Hurayrah (ra) saying the Prophet (saw) said, "When the call for prayer is made, Shaytaan flees".


8. When seeking refuge in Allaah due to the Exalted's saying: "And when an incitement to evil comes to you from Shaytaan, seek refuge in Allaah. He is the All Hearing, the All Knowing". (41:36)


9. When you say "A'oodhu billah minka, al'anuka bi l'anatillaah" [I seek refuge in Allah from you, I curse you with the curse of Allah] three times during the prayer.

Abu Dardaa' (ra) reports that "Allaah's Messenger (saw) stood for prayer and we heard him saying, "I seek refuge in Allaah from you". Then he said, "I curse you with the curse of Allaah" three times. At the same time, he was stretching out his hand, trying to grab hold of something. When he finished his prayer we said to him: "O Messenger of Allaah! We heard you say something in the prayer which we have never heard from you before and we saw you stretching out your hand". He said, "That was the enemy of Allaah, Iblees. He came with a flame of fire and tried to throw it in my face. I said, "I seek refuge in Allah from you" three times and then (I said), "I curse you with the curse of Allaah" three times and he did not hesitate. Then I desired to capture him. By Allaah! If it had not been for the supplication of our brother (the Prophet) Sulaymaan, he would have been tied up and the children of Madinah would have played about with him"". (Muslim).

In another hadeeth from 'Uthmaan bin Abul-Aas (ra) who said, "I said, "O Messenger of Allaah! Shaytaan comes in between me and my prayer and my recitation, confusing me." He said, "That is a Shaytaan called Khunzub. When you feel his presence, seek refuge in Allaah from him and spit on your left three times." I did as he said and Allaah took that (distraction) away from me." (Muslim)


10. When the servant finds something in his soul that concerns him and says "huwal-awwalu wal-aakhiru wadh-dhaahiru wal-baatinu wa huwa bi kulli shay'in 'aleem" [He is the First and the Last, the Outermost and the Innermost, and He has Knowledge of every single thing.]

Abu Zameel (ra) said, "I said to Ibn 'Abbas (ra), "What is this thing which I find in my soul?" - meaning doubt. He said, "When you find something like that in your soul, then say, "He (Allaah) is the First and the Last, the Outermost and the Innermost and He has knowledge of every single thing."" (Abu Dawood, al-Albaani declared it hasan in al-Kalim ut-Tayyib no.135).


11. When a calamity befalls you and you say "QadrAllahu wa ma sha' Allaahu fa'ala" [Allah has decreed (this) and He does whatever He wills].

Abu Hurayrah (ra) reports that Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "The strong believer is more loved by Allaah than the weak believer, but in both there is good. Be zealous for what will benefit you. Seek help from Allaah the Mighty and Majestic and do not become incapacitated. If something afflicts you, do not say: "If only I had done such and such" but say, "Allaah has decreed (this) and He does whatever He wills". Indeed saying "if.." opens up the doorway of Shaytaan's handiwork." (Muslim)


12. When you say "Bismillah, Allahumma janibna ash-Shaytaan wa janibish-Shaytaana maa razaqtna" {in the Name of Allaah, O Allaah! Make us distant from Shaytaan and make Shaytaan distant from what you bestow upon us".

Ibn 'Abbaas (ra) reports that the Prophet (saw) said, "If one of you says, when approaching his wife (for intercourse): "In the Name of Allaah. O Allaah! Make us distant from Shaytaan and make Shaytaan distant from what you bestow upon us" and offspring is decreed for you, Shaytaan will never be able to harm it (i.e. the offspring)". (al-Bukhaari, Muslim).


13. When you say in a state of anger "A'oodhu bilLaahi min ash-Shaytaan ir-Rajeem" [I seek refuge with Allaah from Shaytaan the Accursed].

Sulaymaan bin Sard (ra) said, "I was sitting with Allaah's Messenger (saw) and two men were abusing each other. The face of one of them had become red (out of anger) and his veins had become inflated. Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "I know a word which, if he was to say, his anger would leave him. If he said: "I seek refuge in Allaah from Shaytaan the Accursed", his anger would leave him"" (al-Bukhaari, Muslim).


14. Upon saying "bismillah" [in the Name of Allah]

Abul-Maleeh (ra) reports that a man said, "I was behind the Messenger (saw) and his riding animal stumbled. I said, "May Shaytaan perish", and he said, "Do not say, "May Shaytaan perish". If you say that he will grow in size until he becomes the size of a house and says, "By my strength". Instead say, "In the Name of Allaah". When you say that, he reduces in size until he is like a fly." (Abu Dawood, saheeh isnad).


15. When you supplicate for blessings for something which wins your admiration.

Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "When one of you sees something in his self or in his possessions which amazes him (or wins his admiration) he should invoke blessings upon it as the (evil) eye is indeed true and real".


16. When you recite the M'uwadhdhataan [Surah al-Falaq and Surah an-Naaz].

Abu Sa'eed (ra) said, "Allaah's Messenger (saw) used to seek refuge from the jinn and from the effects of the (evil) of men until the m'uwwadhdhataan were revealed. When they were revealed he clung to them and abandoned what was besides them." (at-Tirmidhi, hasan; an-Nasa'ee and Ibn Maajah - saheeh).


17. When you make the prostration of recitation.

Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "When you read a verse of prostration then prostrate, Shaytaan departs crying and says: "Woe be to him. He was ordered with prostration and he prostrated - so for him is Paradise. I was ordered with prostration and I refused - so for me is the Fire." (Muslim, Ahmad and Ibn Maajah).


18. When you recite Surah al-Baqarah.

Abu Hurayrah (ra) reports that Allaah's Messenger (saw) said, "Do not turn your houses into graves. Indeed Shaytaan flees from a house in which Surah al-Baqarah is recited." (Muslim).


19. When reciting the Qur'aan.

The Messenger of Allaah (saw) went out one night and passed by Abu Bakr (ra) who was praying with a lowered voice. Then he passed by 'Umar ibn al-Khattaab (ra) who was praying with a raised voice When they came together with the Prophet (saw), he said, "O Abu Bakr! I passed by you while you were praying with a lowered voice." Abu Bakr (ra) said, "I made the one with whom I was conversing with (i.e Allaah) hear it, O Messenger of Allaah." He then said to 'Umar (ra), "I passed by you while you were praying with a raised voice". 'Umar (ra) said, "O Messenger of Allaah! I was incitng those who were asleep and driving away the Shaytaan." The Prophet (saw) then said, "O Abu Bakr! Raise your voice somewhat" and he said to 'Umar, "lower your voice somewhat". (Abu Dawood, al Haakim, who declared it saheeh as did adh-Dhahabi).


20. When you move the finger during the prayer.

It is established that Allaah's Messenger (saw) used to move his finger, supplicating with it (Abu Dawood, an-Nasaa'i, Ibn al_Jaarud in al-Muntaqa and others) and the Messenger of Allaah said, "It is more powerful against the Shaytaan than iron" - meaning the forefinger. (Ahmad and others).

Imaam Ahmad was asked, "Should a man point with his finger in the prayer?" He replied, "Yes, vigorously". (Ibn Haani mentioned it in Masaa'il of Imaam
Ahmad).

~ Faith ~

Hadith:

The person who is not trustworthy has no Iman (faith).






(http://www.albalagh.net/)

~ Time is Life ~

Time is Life :


"By the time. Verily Man is in a state of loss. Except such as have Faith and do righteous deeds and exhort one another to Truth and exhort one another to endurance." [al-Asr, 103].

Time is money. So goes the most used metaphor for time in the English language. There is some truth in it as time can be used to produce wealth and wasting time may also mean losing opportunities to produce wealth. Yet this metaphor also implies something about the purpose of life itself that we should examine carefully. If a child says that money is candy, he'll be right in the sense that money can be used to buy candy. But adults will laugh at him because the statement implies that candy is the most important object that money can buy. Similarly "Time is money" implies that money is the most important object in life: One must value time as he or she values money.

Historically this has been one of the key metaphors driving the engine of industrial revolution and technological development in the past few centuries. A lot of inventions and new technique have aimed at saving time and therefore money. And certainly the list of such inventions and their achievements in speed are mind-boggling. Today men, materials, and ideas can be moved from one place to another at an astonishing speed. The tasks that used to take months and years can be finished in minutes. And yet there is something ironic about all this development. Despite the tremendous explosion in timesaving gadgets, life has become busier than ever before. Overall we can't show much for all the time that has been saved.

We are very busy, but at the end of the day we can't tell what we have been busy doing. Where all the saved time has gone? In what way our lives have become more productive? Just imagine how Internet has made it possible for information to move all over the world in seconds. And then see how the same medium is being used to waste countless hours in frivolous discussions in chat rooms or meaningless net surfing! The juxtaposition of the time saving and time wasting nature of the same tool brings in full focus the basic problem with the prevalent ideas of time itself.

One may think that the metaphor is not to be blamed for this waste. After all "Time is money" would seem to suggest that no time should be wasted. Actually belittling time by equating it with money allows whiling it away when one has made the money he needs! So people talk about "killing time" and the need for the gadgets that let them kill time. One has to consider time to be much more important than money not to waste it like this!

To put things in perspective a quick historic comparison is in order. Consider the period of early Muslims when none of these technological marvels were available. There is a common notion that people then leisurely lived in sleepy little towns and had little to do. Actually that was a period of unprecedented activity in all aspects of life! Theirs was a period of intense military and political activity during which nearly half the known world came under the banner of Islam. Coming from a most backward part of the world, they introduced a new civilization to the world that was proud of its civilization and its military might. In personal life they used to spend a lot more time in worship than we do, most of them spending big parts of their nights in individual prayers. This would seem to leave a lot less time for other pursuits in life. We also know that means of communications were so poor then, that sometimes they had to travel on horseback for weeks or months to go to another area, say, to collect a report of a hadith from someone who had heard it directly from the Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam. Yet during this period and despite all the logistics problems, together they collected the hundreds of thousands of ahadith that have been compiled into various collections and are available today! And this is just one aspect of their work! How in the world did they find time for that?

The answer is simple. They were driven by a different metaphor for time. They valued it as the gift whose proper or improper use would determine the outcome for the eternity. They had listened to the Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, when he said: "There are two blessings that most people are deluded by. Health and available time." [Bukhari]. They took his advice very seriously when he said: "Value five things before five other things: Youth before old age; health before sickness; affluence before poverty; leisure before becoming too busy; and life before death." [Tirmidhi]. Abdullah bin Hasn (Radi-Allahu unhu) reports that whenever two companions met they would not depart till they had recited sura al-Asr to each other reminding themselves of the eternal loss that everyone faces if we waste away our time in foolish pursuits. They did not waste any moment of their life in gossips, useless talks, or meaningless pursuits.

The difference is clear. We may have a fast car, but if we are riding it for the joy of speed driving, not because we want to get there, we'll never get there. The success of our elders or salaf lies in their overriding sense of purpose and accountability and their concern with using their time very carefully.

Coming closer to our own period we find other examples of a similar nature. Consider the case of Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi, who died about sixty years ago. On the surface he just ran a small monastery and a religious school and was given to spending long periods of time in individual worship. But he also authored about 1200 publications ranging from small booklets to encyclopedic works like "Bahishti Zevar", which has seen millions of copies in print. He also used to answer all his mail everyday, which consisted of dozens and sometimes hundreds of pieces. And he taught many generations of scholars! His secret? A strict discipline born of a deep concern about accountability for time.

We are becoming older every day. One day our time will be up and we'll leave this world forever. What happens afterwards will depend solely on how we used all the moments available to us before that certain but unknown moment comes. Time is life. What is at stake is the entire eternity.


(http://www.themodernreligion.com/basic/charac/essay_time.htm)

~ Good Muslim, Good Human Being ~

Good Muslim, Good Human Being :
(Taken from Albalagh)

(http://www.themodernreligion.com/MUSLIM.htm)


Ihsan is a special Islamic term, defined by the famous hadith known as the Hadith-Jibreel. Once Angel Jibreel, alayhi salam, visited the Prophet, Salla-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, in the guise of a man and in the presence of companions. This happened toward the end of the Prophetic mission and its purpose to summarize some fundamental teachings of Islam for the education of all of us. Jibreel, alayhi salam, asked questions about Islam, Iman, Ihsan, the Day of Judgement, and Fate. Regarding Ihsan, the Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, responded: "It is that you worship Allah as if you are seeing Him. For though you see Him not, verily He is seeing you." Obviously, our worship will be at its best when performed with that feeling. Ihsan, therefore, means striving for excellence in achieving piety, through an overwhelming feeling of closeness to Allah.

For anyone seeking spiritual purification, this is the goal. Abdul-Hameed Siddiqi, well known for his English translation of Sahih Muslim, notes that what is implied by the term tassawuf is nothing but Ihsan. With that in mind we can understand the joy of the person who once reported to his mentor that he had achieved Ihsan in his prayers. He felt being in the presence of Allah every time he stood up for prayers. "It is great that you should feel that way while praying, " his mentor replied. "But, do you have the same feelings when you are dealing with others? Have you attained Ihsan in relations with your spouse and children? In relations with friends and relatives? In all social relations?" To the perplexed disciple he went on to explain that one must not restrict the concept of Ihsan to the performance of ritual prayers. The term is general and applies to all endeavors in our life.

The Sufi mentor in this story was Dr. Abdul Hai Arfi, himself a disciple of Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi. One of the many great contributions of Maulana Thanvi was that he reintroduced Islamic teachings regarding social relations and dealings with others as a religious issue. His message: You must become a good human being before you can ever become a good Muslim. This message destroys a disastrous and tragic misconception that reduces Islam to only the performance of the ritual acts of worship---the pillars---thus robbing it of much of the rest of the building. (Some others try to construct the building without the pillars---an even more devastating and futile act---but that is another subject). A very important and integral section of that building deals with our social relations. It is concerned with how we behave in the family. How we interact with relatives, friends, neighbors, colleagues, and all the rest of humanity.

The cornerstone of Islamic teachings in this area is the requirement that we do not cause anyone any hurt through our words or actions. A famous hadith states, "A Muslim is the one from whose hands and tongue other Muslims are safe." [Tirmidhi]. Keeping others safe from our hands and tongues does not only mean that we do not hurl stones or abuses at them, it also means that we do not say or do anything that will hurt them.

This hadith clearly describes this as a defining trait of a Muslim. While it refers to "other Muslims," scholars agree that it is a general requirement that equally applies to non-Muslims except those who are at war with the Muslims. A person who, through his intentional or careless actions or words inflicts unjustified pain on others is not worthy of being called a Muslim.

We can begin to appreciate the value of this teaching by realizing that most problems in our lives are man-made. Life can become living hell if there are problems within the family: the tensions between the spouses, the frictions between parents and children, the fights between brothers and sisters and other relatives. Today these are common stories everywhere. But can these problems occur and reach the intensity they do if everyone is genuinely concerned about not hurting others? The same applies to relations between friends, neighbors, colleagues, and communities.

Islam wants to build a society, which is a model of civility, courtesy, and consideration for others. It does so by emphasizing these attributes at a matter of faith. One hadith says that Iman (faith) has seventy-seven branches. The highest one is the declaration that there is no God except Allah and the lowest one is the removal of harmful objects from the path. This is consideration. And obviously, there is no trace of Iman below this.

We see this consideration for others throughout the life of the Prophet Muhammad Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam. Of course, such an attitude shows itself in "minor" details. For example, whenever the Prophet Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam visited a group were some people were asleep and others were not, he would greet them with a low enough voice so those awake could hear him while those asleep would not be disturbed. Every night when he used to get up for Tahajjud (midnight prayer)---a voluntary prayer for the rest of us---he would walk out of the bed very quietly so as not to disturb his sleeping wife.

Whenever he saw someone commit a wrong that needed to be corrected in public for the education of others, he would mention it in general terms, not naming the person who did it. This last practice also shows the two extremes in this regard that must be avoided. On the one hand is the temptation to compromise on the issue of right and wrong to avoid hurt feelings. On the other is the temptation to correct the wrong with total disregard to the fact that one might be insulting or injuring the other person. While we may see these extreme attitudes in people who seem to be poles apart in terms of their practice of religion, both stem from the same narrow vision of religion that holds our dealings with others as worldly affairs, outside the realm of Islam!

It is good to remember that Islam is a way of life. We must submit our whole life, not a small subset of our choosing, to the commands and teachings of Allah and His Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam. Our commitment to Islam must not only be life-long but also life-wide.

~ Love of Allah ~

Love of Allah ........



Loving Allah is the ultimate aim. Having attained the state of true love for Allah, each stage that follows it is one of its fruits and a branch from its roots - such as longing, intimacy and contentment. Each stage that precedes it - such as repentance, perseverance and doing without.

The most beautiful, the most sincere, the most elevated and the most exalted kind of love is most certainly the love of the One Whom hearts were created to love, and for Whom creation was brought into existence to adore. Allah is the One to Whom hearts turn in love, exhalation and glorification, humility, submission and worship. Such worship cannot be directed towards other than Him. It is the perfection of love accompanied by complete submission and humility. Allah is loved for His own sake in every respect. All except Him are loved for the love they give in return. All the revealed Books, and the message of all the Prophets, bear witness to the love that is due towards Him, as does the natural impulse He has created in all His servants, the intellect He has given them, and the blessings He has poured on them.

Hearts, as they mature, come to love whomever is merciful and kind towards them. So how much greater is their love for Him from Whom all kindness springs!

Every good thing enjoyed by His creation is one of His limitless blessings, and He is One with no associates and no partners:

"And whatever good you have - it is from Allah; and then, when misfortune comes to you, you cry to Him for help."

(Qur'an, An-Nahl 16:53)


And also:


"And from among mankind there are some who take for themselves (objects of worship as) rivals to Allah, loving them as they should (only) love Allah. And those who believe are stronger in their love for Allah."

(Qur'an, Al-Baqarah 2:165)


And also:


"O you who believe, whoever of you becomes a rebel against his deen (know that in his place) Allah will bring a people whom He loves and who love Him, humble towards the believers, harsh towards the disbelievers, fighting in the way of Allah, and not fearing the blame of anyone who blames."

(Qur'an, Al-Maidah 5:54)


The Prophet has sworn that no servant truly believes until he, (the Prophet ) is more dear to that servant than his own child, father and all of mankind. (Related Bukhari, kitab al-Iman: 1/58 Muslim, kitab al-Iman, 2/15)

The Prophet also said to Umar ibn al-Khattab, "even until I am more dear to you than your own self". (Related Bukhari, kitab al-Iman wa'n-Nadhur, 11/523)

This means that you are not a true believer until your love for the Prophet Muhammad reaches this level.

If the Prophet must take precedence over our own selves; as Allah says:


"The Prophet is closer to the believers than their own selves."

(Qur'an, Al-Ahzab 33:6)


When it comes to what we love and what this entails, then is not Allah (Most Exalted is He), even more deserving of our love and adoration than our own selves?

Everything that comes from Him to His servants whether it is something that they hate, directs us to love Him. His giving and His withholding, the good fortune and the misfortune that He decrees for His servants and His abasing them and elevating them, His justice and His grace, His giving life and taking it away again, His compassion, generosity and veiling of His servants wrong actions, His forgiveness and patience, His response to His servants' supplications even though He is not in any need of His servants whatsoever - all this invites hearts to worship Him and love Him.

If a Human being were to do the smallest amount of any of these things to another, that person would not be able to restrain his heart from loving him. How can a servant not love, with all his heart and body, the One who is constantly Merciful and Generous towards him in spite of all his wrong actions?

Allah seeks His servants friendship and love by means of His generosity towards him, even though He is not in any need of him. The servant, on the other hand, invites Allah's anger through his disobedience and wrong actions, even though he is in need of His assistance.

Neither Allah's mercy nor His generosity towards the servant deter him from disobeying his Lord. In the same way, neither the servant's disobedience nor his wrong actions deter Allah from granting him His blessings.

Furthermore, while anyone who we love and who loves us may behave like this for personal gain, Allah does so in order to benefit us.

Furthermore, while anyone with whom we trade will not do business with us if he does not make a profit from the transaction - and he will do what he can to make a profit one way or another - Allah (Most Exalted is He) trades with us in order to enable us to make the best and greatest profit for ourselves from our transaction with him. Thus one good deed counts as between ten and seven hundred good deeds, or even more, while a bad deed is recorded as only one bad deed and can be swiftly wiped out.

Allah (Most Exalted is He), in His infinite mercy has created everything for us, both in this world and in the next. Who else then, deserves to be loved and worshipped more than Allah? All that we - and the whole of creation, for that matter - require and need is with Him. He is the Most Generous. He gives His servants more than they need, even before they ask him. He is pleased with even a little right action and increases its rewards. He forgives untold wrong actions and wipes them out. Whatever is in the heavens and the earth supplicates to Him. The multiplicity of things never bewilder Him, nor is He weary by the insistent pleas of His servants. Indeed He is pleased with those who persist in their supplication.

He is ever pleased with His servants who seek His assistance, and He is angry with those who do not. He is displeased when He sees a servant being disobedient and not caring about his actions, and yet He veils His servant's wrong actions while the servant himself does not veil them. He has mercy on His servant while the servant does not have any mercy on himself.

He has called him to His acceptance and mercy through His compassion and generosity - but he declines. He has sent Messengers to him and made His covenant known through them. Allah, even draws near him and says:

"....Is there anyone who is calling on Me, so I may answer his prayer? Is there anyone who is asking of Me, so I may grant his request? Is there anyone who is seeking My forgiveness, so that I may forgive him?" (Related by Muslim, Kitab al-Musafirin wa Qasruhu, 6/36)

How then, can our hearts not love Him, the One who - and no other than Him - grants rewards, answers prayers, pardons mistakes, forgives sins, veils wrong actions, dispels grief and drives away sorrow?

He alone, is worthy of remembrance, worship and praise. He is the most generous to be asked, the most liberal to give, the most merciful to pardon, the mightiest to assist and the most dependable to rely on.

He is more merciful to His servant, than a mother is to her baby. He is more pleased by the repentance of the penitent sinner than a man who is overjoyed to find his riding beast, with all his provisions still on its back after he had lost it in a barren land and had given up all hope of survival.

He is pleased with the obedient servant for his obedience, even though it could not have happened without his help and assistance. He pardons and forgives even after He has been disobeyed. And yet, the rights which are due to Him are the ones which are most rejected and neglected.

He is the nearest witness, the most sublime protector, the most true to His Word, and the most just of all Judges. He knows the secrets of the selves:


"There is not an animal of whose forelock He does not have a hold."

(Qur'an, Hud 11:56)


He records the actions and decides the lifetimes of His slaves. To Him, the secrets in the hearts are known and the Unseen revealed. Everyone yearns for Him, faces humble themselves before the Light of His Face, and minds are completely incapable of understanding the Essence of His Being.

Love of Allah the Almighty gives life to the Heart and sustains the soul. The heart experiences no pleasure, nor feels any joy, nor tastes any success - not even life - if it does not have this love. If the heart loses this love, then the loss it suffers is more severe than that of the eye when it is deprived of its sight and the ear when it is deprived of its hearing.

Even worse than this, the decay of the heart when it is devoid of love for its Creator, Source, and True God, is far worse than that of the body when it no longer contains the soul. This truth is only recognised by the people who are alive, for a wound does not pain the dead.

A righteous man once said in a poem:

And love your Lord by serving Him
For lovers are but servants of the Beloved

When she was giving counsel to her children, one of the women of the salaf once said to them, "Make it a habit to love and obey Allah, for those who have taqwah take their obedience to the point where their body experiences aversion for anything other than obedience. If the cursed one (shaytan) tries to tempt them to do something wrong, the wrong actions is ashamed and avoids them because of the way in which it is rejected by them."

Abdullah ibn al-Mubarak recited:

You disobey Allah,
and yet you still claim to love Him.
By Allah, such behaviour is disgusting,
by any standard!
You would have obeyed Him had your love been true.
For the lover is always obedient to the Beloved!


(http://www.missionislam.com/knowledge/love.htm)

~ Love Has No Boundaries ~

Love Has No Boundaries .........


Love has no boundaries and passes over borders, thoughts and imagination. Have you ever imagined that you…hopeless of having a better existence, you that considered love useless and had a bad impression of today's youth…can end up in a relationship with a man 20 years younger than you?

Now you are the one with butterflies in the stomach, you want to admire the sun; you hold his hand and dream of romantic walks in the park.

You feel guilty because he is younger. You are a bit frustrated because you do not know how long this relationship will last and because you are sure that a younger woman will take him away from you.

If love is without limits, it means that everything is possible and he can love you as much as you love him. Maybe he has the same fears: he may think that any time a mature man can impress you, or that he is below your expectations.

You think about gossips. Yes, people gossip. You think about your friends and family. Why? Don't you deserve to be loved? So what if he is younger? Maybe he is the one you need, the chosen one. He makes you feel great with his smile, jokes and surprises.

Why let others step into your life? You can make your own decisions and you are ready to assume responsibilities for your actions. You have the right to be happy, just like anybody else, even if happiness is different in the opinion of others. If other people would care about you, they would not be judgmental. If they knew that this man who is younger than you is the reason of your well-being, they should leave you alone, not judge you and be by your side.

Do not be afraid others gossip and try to do your best to be happy and have a nice existence.

~ Save Your Relationship ~

Save Your Relationship ......


So many times relationships start out wonderfully with excitement and joy. Then before long, many begin to wonder where the love has gone. This articles describes some of the simple laws of love, which, when practiced, keep love going strong.

So many times relationships start out wonderfully, the person is joyous and feels as if they’ve found, "the one". Then as time passes, they begin to wonder where has the love gone? Many feel lost when this happens. They do not know what went wrong, or what steps need to be taken to make things right again.

It seems to many that love is a mystery. When one relationship ends, they fear they may never find someone new, or be able to love again. Or, even when things are going well, unexpected obstacles can arise that seem to difficult to overcome. Tremendous amounts of time and emotion are spent trying to figure out what is going on.

But stop a moment and think about it. You would never try to build a building without first getting an architect’s plan. Without a strong foundation, any passing storm would easily knock the building down. The same is true of relationships. Although we learn many things during years of schooling, most never have the opportunity to learn the basic laws of loving relationships, what is required to make them work.

So many jump into relationships wanting to fly to the heights without having any understanding at all of how to build a solid foundation that will allow their relationship to stand strong. However, just as an architect knows and respects the laws of gravity, we too must know and work with the basic laws of love. These laws operate unfailingly. They are the cornerstone of all relationships and guidelines for the human heart. Once we learn and apply the basic laws of love, it is truly impossible to fail at love. No matter what happens.

Unfortunately, rather than learn these simple laws, most have absorbed many myths and fantasies. They then suffer greatly when their dreams do not come to pass and either blame themselves and others. However, it is extremely important to realize that the only thing that causes hurt, loss, or distress in relationships are the fantasies we hold onto. Once we replace these fantasies with the simple laws of love, a whole new world opens. Confusion is cleared up and we naturally see the right steps to take.

To begin with, let us absorb this law #1. It is impossible to fail at love.

No one is a failure in love. Our mistakes, losses, confusion and mishaps do not arise because of love. They arise simply out of our ignorance of who we are and what love truly is.

In order to recognize real love, we must move onwards to law #2. There is a difference between real and counterfeit love.

Counterfeit love is based upon the idea that love is an emotion, a wonderful feeling, not a way of life. In counterfeit love, when we have strong feelings towards someone, we immediately assume that we are in love. But all feelings naturally change, that is their nature. Many feel that love is leaving when this happens. They do not realize that it is the nature of feelings to change, and that this is also the nature of counterfeit love.

Counterfeit love is confusion between excitement, dependence, attachment and love. Real love does not fluctuate. We do not reject the other person if they do not meet our needs. Real love grows through action. It is love is a verb, upon deeds of kindness, value and respect. It knows that the foundation of lasting relationships is built something deeper than feelings that come and go.

Love brings fulfillment, healing, kindness, warmth and inspiration. Let us separate truth from error here. If this is not what's going on in your relationship, it is not an expression of love. But it is easy to save your relationship. Let us learn how to build relationships that are based on a strong foundation. Once you learn and practice the laws of love you will not only save your relationship, but become all you were meant to be.

~ Boundaries in Relationships ~

Boundaries in Relationships ........


The literal meaning of the word 'boundary' is the line which should not be crossed. For example, the boundary between two countries. The personal boundaries in relationships are important to ensure our peace of mind and identity. Setting these boundaries is necessary in many case,s due to the over-dominating and aggressive behavior of the partner. Sometimes, one partner starts calling all the shots in a relationship and leaves the other as a mere spectator. He takes all the decisions without taking into consideration the opinion of the other partner. This can be very frustrating as one loses personal freedom and the right to voice our opinion. In the next few paragraphs, the importance of emotional boundaries in relationships has been explained in detail.

Importance of Boundaries in Relationships

Creating boundaries in relationships means being very clear about your likes and dislikes to your partner. You have to make your partner aware that you are an independent living being and would not tolerate excessive interference in your life. You should set proper limits and be very vocal about your rights and demands. In the absence of boundaries in relationships, the other partner might feel that you do not have any opinion of your own and can be 'handled easily'. Read more on relationship advice.

Domestic abuse, whether physical or mental, is a result of the lack of boundaries in relationship. In the cases of domestic abuse, the oppressor takes it for granted that his partner should follow his instructions and stop his/her individual thinking process. The mistake which the abusive relationship victims commit is, to stay quiet for a long period of time till the situation finally gets out of hand. Instead, by reacting in an aggressive way at the right time, the oppressor can be made aware of his wrong deeds. Most of the times, the victims keep quiet because of intense fear and worries of what would happen if they react. A relationship can work only by respecting the boundaries set by each other. You should remember that there is a very thin line between your duties and the boundaries set in a relationship. More on relationship issues.

How to Set Boundaries in Relationships?

Now, having understood the importance of respecting boundaries in relationships, let us understand how to set boundaries in relationships. While establishing boundaries in relationships, you should communicate with your partner in a very straight forward way. Place your demands in front of him and tell him what you expect from him. Explain to him with reasons, why you are setting such boundaries and then see to it that he is okay with the boundaries set. Do not go ahead with the relationship till you get an affirmative answer from your partner, that he/she will honor the rules and regulations of the boundaries in the relationship. However, the boundaries in relationships are applicable for both you and your partner and hence, you should patiently listen what your partner wants from you. See whether you agree to the the terms put forth by him/her and then take a decision accordingly. Given below are some of the viable or sensible boundaries to set in a relationship:

* I will not tolerate physical or emotional abuse under any circumstances.
* I will not tolerate deceiving or infidelity in the relationship.
* I should be given equal importance in the financial matters.
* I should not be forced to do the things which I do not like.
* I should have full freedom to meet people whom I like.
* I should be given full freedom to take all my career decisions on my own.

~ Types Of Relationships ~

Types Of Relationships ........



There are a variety of relationships in our daily life. They can be passer-by, short, between two people meeting on the street and just saying "Hello!" or they can be formal, between business people that are having a meeting.


The closest relationships will always occupy the most of our attention and time because they have the potential of bringing most happiness in our lives but also they can bring the most painful moments as well. The family is, from the beginning of mankind, one of the most important points in a person's life. The family is the one you belong to, the family is the first you are missing when you are far away and the one you feel that you can lean on when you feel lonely, and the family should surely be the place where you feel home, no matter where you are. Unfortunately it often happens that families fall apart, parents are breaking up and the children are being raised only with one family part.

I think that anyone who ever felt the warmth and happiness of a loving family is praising this and should do everything that is required to keep the family relationship working well, because without the loved ones we would feel lonely in this world.

When it comes to the relationship between lovers, it is by far the most complex and rewarding of them all. Probably the most beautiful is the one where you are getting back all the love and trust you are giving to your partner. When you find the person that you can’t do without and your loved one has the same kind of love for you it is indeed a blessing, you know you found your perfect match. However the relationship has its challenges and the less pleasant moment will not cease to appear and if not handled properly, these problems can bring the most beautiful of relationships to the edge of disaster. You're starting to see only bad things and habits of the loved person and you forget to praise all the good sides you once adored so much, the love you felt turns into routine and the risk of finding someone else or being cheated rises fast.

Communication is the key for a good love relationship and when time builds the trust pillar (and does not weaken it) you are on the right way to building a beautiful and healthy bond, thus establishing the limits, the principles of your conducts. For instance, even in the most serious relationship, we all need free space to feel independent. That's why we have to try to not cover the partner with too much love or control her/him. If the love is true and deep nothing will ever tear lovers apart.

Relationships between parents and children are often difficult, mostly when the children are growing up. Getting older means for most of us knowing more, understanding what in the past were just mysteries and starting to explore new things on our own. One of the worst problems between parents and their kids is the lack of communication. Parents are not trying to understand us better, they are busy with their jobs and other "adult" problems. Even if sometimes or most of the times it is quite hard to understand why parents are getting mad so easily or why some things are forbidden, children should try to accept parents' decision because in the end we all know that parents are just wanting the best for us. In the meantime parents should try to be a little more tolerant and to understand that nowadays the youth can't be like the youth was at their time and that we are having more opportunities than they had. We also have to remember that we're facing a way more complicated society with more problems and more and better ways to have fun and so, to get in danger.

We can't say much about the relationships between neighbors. They can be good or bad. Sure… it would be perfectly if it could be like in those movies where neighbors are coming to borrow coffee or sugar from you but the reality is often not that bright. Try to get along with your neighbors, and maybe they are showing their nice side too!

Here are some of the stereotypes of relationships that exist between people in every day's life. Even sometimes we face up problems, we need these people in our lives… we need affection, we need love and support. Learn to appreciate the people around you!

(http://www.buzzle.com/articles/types-of-relationships.html)

~ Do You Love Someone Who Doesn't Love You ~

Do You Love Someone Who Doesn't Love You .......


What To Do When the Person You Love Doesn't Love You Back?

Accept the Reality:
When we are in love with someone it feels like he/she is the only person that will make us happy. What we fail to realize is that we can never be happy with the person who will not love us. So even though you might be ready to commit for life, the person you are in love with does not share the same feelings. So instead of sitting around moping away, accept that the love is not mutual and try to move on in life. Do not invest any more time or thought or energy in this person. Acceptance and realization of these facts will allow you to change your focus and take the first steps towards moving on.

Move on:
As easy as it may sound, a relationship breakup is probably the most difficult part. Cry your heart out and then start by throwing away any of the photos and mementos that may remind you of the happy times that you spent together. Stay away from places and things that might remind you of him/her. Instead do things that will keep you busy such as spending time with friends, doing the things that you like to do and which make you happy. This will make you stop fantasizing about the person and make you look at other things in life.

Fall in Love:
If someone doesn't like you and is still with you then they may not be putting a lot of themselves in the bargain. A willingness to accept little in return while hanging around and moping after someone who isn’t available shows how little you value yourself and your love. Instead stop torturing yourself about how inadequate you are and how great the other person is and move on in life. Pay attention to yourself and do not dwell on unnecessary things. With time you will learn to forget and fall in love again.

True love is when two people are able to emotionally and mentally share the feelings for each other. This makes the love healthy, balanced and just right for a person. So if you have expressed your love for someone and he/she does not seem to love you back, then do not waste your valuable love on someone who does not care for it. Although you love someone who doesn't love you, remember that it is not the end of the world. In time you would surely meet the person who not only makes you happy, but loves you to pieces as well.

~ Being A Woman ~

Being A Woman ......



While understanding the sex of a child, it’s fascinating to learn why is it that boys love to play with guns and not with dolls and why in the world are girls so good with languages and not maths! Of course there may be several exceptions to the rule, but the intriguing thing to note here is that all this while, while we talk about women, we do so either with pity or with scorn.

Some interesting discoveries
Initially, as the embryonic tissue transforms itself into various organs for both boys and girls, it is only until the baby has grown to a great extent that that you can observe a difference in both. Generally the extra Y doesn't make much of a difference, as girls today are definitely the preferred lot! Boys and girls have this intrinsic value added to both of them, the value of complementing each other in the various roles that they play in life.

Girls are the emotional kind while boys tend to be a lot more logical in life. Their brains are also fashioned in much the same manner. The logical powerhouse of the brain is more open to boys than the girls. While statistics over time may be different for both, you cannot really have a yardstick for both of them. You'll notice that girls would be more attracted to color and dolls. One of the reasons for this may be because they have so many colours around them. Their dresses, way of styling them etc., is so beleaguered with variety that it’s difficult not to miss them! Boys on the other hand have this intrinsic love affair with noise. They love games that are either destructive or loud. There are few girls who when grow up too have a definite liking for heavy metallic rock for instance.

Although most brain development is similar to both of them, girls develop a liking for easy-going things faster than boys. For boys it becomes a question of ego, irrespective of the age. Perhaps they are conditioned for doing so since the time that they are young. Both sexes for example, share their admiration for subjects like Physics, Music, art, although the form may differ, the subject is loud and clear.

Girls who are largely exposed to high levels of androgens, the male hormone, are more drawn towards toys such as cars and less interested in dolls, doll houses, etc. Although these girls are very few in number, we tend to stereotypes them as tomboys. They the kind who love to climb trees, play football and do almost all masculine things, girls as a rule are not supposed to do!

Puberty and the woman
Interestingly, girls have a variety of hormones. Another reason why they appreciate variety in life more than boys! They possess hormones including estrogen, progesterone and androgens, that undergo rapid changes wit the onset of puberty. It is these hormones that give them their identity so as to speak. Their mood swings, their irritation, their instant craving for sweets and chocolate and their innate quest for finding love.

Girls are often blamed once they grow up to want for more affection as they grow. Their fathers are the first male role models for them and every girl sub consciously desires their future husband/ partner to follow a pattern on similar lines. The changes in their cycles also make them into the people they are; literally. The agony and pain that they go through each month determines their character; that is whether they will grin and bear it or rather take immediate action against it.

The important question here is that if there is everything starts with puberty, why does it stop? A simple answer to this may be because like for all of us for the girls especially, life is noting but a sophisticated machine; their bodies notwithstanding! Well like a machine, girls get used to their systems and make use of their channels rather well. It is only with Menopause that roughly occurs at the age of 45 that the feeling of restlessness sets in.

By mid age, depression further worsens the condition. Although men have their set of troubles too, it may be perhaps women being born with that extra special X chromosome are equipped with facing things that are larger than life for them. Child birth and motherhood, separation, divorce, all have a special comfort level within their bodies as it were. All these perils in life can actually bring out the best in them, unlike men.

Like the body degenerates, so do the hormones that make a woman. The estrogen production by the ovaries falls as menopause occurs. This is one time that she needs to be especially careful of her bones, the calcium in her body and her teeth. With the decrease in estrogen production, women are prone to conditions like osteoporosis, arthritis, and all of these begin with just a sprain. And the sprain if left unattended to can develop into a frozen shoulder and also rheumatoid arthritis.

The ovaries work harder, may develop cysts, in case there is lesser intake of water. With the fall in fertility rate, on the one hand where some women have no fear of pregnancy, others may be plagued with an empty feeling of restlessness, hot flushes, etc. Such is the fascinating story of the evolution of being a woman! And you thought she was plain silly?! Well, if you only had to go through all that she does in an entire life time, you’ll know where it all comes from!

~ Are You Ready for Love? `

Are You Ready for Love? .....



A good relationship isn't a game you play or an ego trip you take. It is about love
and two people. Loving someone can give us the greatest joy we can ever know and
it can hurt more than we can believe too. When it does not really hurt when that
person did something disappointing to you, but really hurts when you see that
person in pain and sadness, then you know you truly love that person.

Loving someone means you should be ready to experience heartache and happiness at
the same time. That's the reward and that's the risk. Unless we are willing to
experience it, we will never really know what it's like to love and be loved.

Sharing love is probably the most valuable and meaningful experience a person
can ever have. And there's a difference between being in love with someone and
loving someone. It's the difference between a love that's fickle, wild and
short-lived and one that's tender and passionate, nurturing and lasts a long time.
The first is easy. The second, the one that really matters to all of us, takes
work -- because it's about keeping a relationship.

Loving someone takes efforts. We have to be able to communicate with each other.
Nobody can read anyone else's mind. We always presume that our partner knows what
we think and feel. Maybe in time we might be able to predict or sense each other's
thoughts but it's never perfect and takes time to develop.

Getting the chance to love and be loved by someone is blessed. Respect
him/her for who he/she is, and not what you want him/her to be. Everyone
is pretty and special in his/her own special way. No one is perfect. It is
true love which closes the gap of imperfectness to form a smooth surface
of acceptance for each other. True love sees and accepts a person for who
he/she is. It is also true love which makes a person change for the better.

The power of true love to a person is undeniable.

A relationship needs commitments too. What is love without commitments
from each other anyway? It's like principles and values. Everyone has
them but they only mean as much as we are willing to stand for them.

The same goes for our commitments to relationships, and the person we love.

"Love is like an antique vase. It's hard to find, hard to get, but easy to break."

Every day everywhere, people fall in love...but just how many of these
relationships are self-sacrificing love, and not just relationships
which are formed only for the intense feeling of falling in love?
I know hundreds of friends who say the magical words "I love you"...
but more often than not, the truth is just -- I am IN love with you.
There is a difference between being in love with someone and loving
someone. If a person says he/she is in love with you, he/she means
that he/she likes you for who you are now and he/she fell in love
with you because of the present you.

This kind of love is temporary and lasts only as long as the fairytale lasts.
When back to reality, we see
the heartache of such a relationship...where both were only IN love with each other.

But if a person says he/she loves you, he/she means that he/she
loves you unconditionally for who you are now, who you were in
the past and who you might be in the future. When he/she says he/she
loves you and really means it, you have to ask yourself if you love
him/her too or if you're in love with the idea of being in love.
It is very hard to see the difference through logical thinking.
Let your heart guide you. May you be blessed on
your soul-searching journey for your soulmate.